ANXIETY CAUSED BY MCO | 15 Feb. 2021

 

If you have been reading my previous post, I am a full time student and part time private nurse. MCO was imposed early January and extended to February, Im not really sure if it's still be prolonged until end February. Physical classes were on hold and done virtually, on the other I need to stay with my patient to avoid inter district travelling which is not allowed during MCO. 

For the past few weeks it was easy, working, doing my online class, jogging and cooking. Im getting used to it actually. Although I'm missing my own routine and my house, I know I can still go on with this kind of situation Im facing now. 

But one fine night, I felt anxious, I cant sleep, whenever I close my eyes I think of so many things. I chest is heavy, keep pacing on the bed, i'ts just feel so heavy. Im not really sure what I am feeling, most of the time when I'm experiencing this kind of feeling, all I knew is that my mom or my parents thinking about me or something is about to happen. 

Maybe I just miss my own independence. Im not used to being told what to do if it's not related to work. It's because I am staying in somebodies house so I need to get along with them. I can tolerate but thats not me. Still got few more days, 3 days actually before they will announce again another extension or easing  of MCO rules. 

I want to go home and be my own self. My own rules and my own pace. 

Just wondering if you understood what I'm venting out.